Exploring Conflict Resolution using the Gottman's Blueprint

By now, you might know how much I love Drs. John and Julie Gottman and all the AMAZING research that The Gottman Institute has done. In my own practice, I use a version of this hand-out, here called Money Conflict Blueprint, but it could really be used for any conflict and not necessarily money issues. Have a look:

I use the first two sections with couples the most. And, yes, I know it may not be natural to compartmentalize your feelings (read " to not react") and repeat back your partner's experience, but it gets more natural with time and practice. Most of us did not grow up with this level of emotional intelligence, so this is a great formula to practice practice practice and level up.

I recently learned in a podcast featuring Dr. John Gottman (Dax Shepard's Armchair Expert) that he writes notes while his wife Dr. Julie Gottman is speaking so that he can remain calm, listen well and "get it right" when he repeats her requests back to her.

So take a look, check out the Gottman’s website and practice with your clients. You'll be a pro in conflict resolution in no time!