Happy #$%! Valentine’s Day

This blog is for all of you who feel lonely and a bit left out on Valentine’s Day. It’s also for those who are madly in love and planning your perfect date. Last but not least, it’s for the ones who have lost that “loving feeling” under layers of childcare, carpooling and grinding work schedules.

Valentine’s Day can make us feel as if all of our self-worth is wrapped up in whether or not we have a romantic evening planned. Hello. Reality check! Your life is so much bigger than that! It is just one day out of 365. Valentine's Day certainly can’t define how fulfilling our lives are but it’s hard not to have false expectations when we are constantly bombarded by the commercial hoopla that goes with it.

My friend, Lou, recounted her worst. Valentine’s Day ever.  “It had been two months since I’d even been on a date,” she told me, “and all my friends were in committed relationships. They gushed on and on about special dinners and sexy lingerie. That night I went to a movie alone . . . not a good idea, I discovered. I felt emotionally isolated – as if I was the only one who was all alone in a sea of couples. It was a terrible feeling. I realized then that something had to change, and it was my attitude.”

The people in our lives and the relationships that we choose are an ongoing process that fulfills and defines us 365 days a year. That’s where our focus needs to be. If our lives are full and rewarding, then Valentine’s Day is just a day - whether you are in a romantic relationship or not.

If you are in a committed loving relationship and both of you choose to celebrate in a special way, that’s great! I would hope, however, that celebrating your love continues to be an ongoing thing and not only once a year.

If you are not in a romantic relationship, then Valentine’s Day may be a day like any other – in a good, relaxing way! You can make of it what you want. If there is a special friend, parent, or child that you would like to honor for bringing joy into your life then perhaps you could channel some of that loving energy into creating a different type of Valentine’s Day celebration with them. You could even be your own Valentine and do something special to honor yourself! There are many kinds of love worth celebrating. 

If you are in a relationship that's gone stale because of life’s demands, then Valentine’s Day can be a chance to slow down and bring fun and romance back into your relationship. Go ahead and buy the flowers and chocolates and have a special dinner - but make sure that it will be the first of many occasions during the year to create special time for your partner.

I wish you all a happy Valentine’s Day, no matter how you choose to spend it. Just remember that every day is a celebration of love for those who are special to you. Let them know how special they are and feel blessed. ❤️